Thursday, July 24, 2008

Life of H4 'bahus' in Uncle Sam's Land


Now I know there must be a tonne of articles out there on the so called "plight" of women who move to the US on a dependent Visa..(Dependent visa =H4= no own identity=completely dependent on spouse for anything from ID to what not!)

I thought I should contribute to this so called "phenomenon" or situation that some girls land into sometimes.. and by sometimes, I mean when they marry an US vaaasi..

H4 status brings along with it the following:

- no job(but of course... so for those women who have been working are surely in for a huge hibernation period.. by that I mean a lot of sleep, tonnes of weight waiting to be put on...)

- A perfect homemaker ( Women these days don't like the house wife term.. come on!! we are way beyond that and worth much more)...
So there is going to be a lotta dusting, cleaning, vaccuming, laundry..oh yeah how can I forget the dishes!!!)

- Beauty sleep galore.. you can get to sleep whenever you want, however long you want.. there isnt any job in the beckoning now, is there??
- TV - and by that I mean new soaps, more soaps and even more soaps...
- A wonderful cook in the making, trying out new recipes to please hubby dear and make him put on even more weight..
- Last but never the least, the good old telephone/cell/mobile.. and there are some great deals here... Unlimited calling to people on the same network, unlimited calling on weekends.. so there aint no harm in getting as many people on your network now..its like a million birds hit with one stone...
The list is going to be endless..cuz if one is out of a job and at home, these are the obvious things that come to one's mind about the bahu...

Now wait a minute, does the above sound extremely shallow and dweeby? I mean is this all a woman - (h4 or no h4) is reduced to at the end of the day???
This is my take on it...and here it comes...

First of all, all of those things that I have listed above are probably the first impressions or thoughts that will come to anyone's mind when they think of our 'bahu'. But let me tell you, this world is made up of all sorts of women..and bahus.. I am not disregarding the fact that there arent women who do the exact same things that are mentioned above..but for those women, who still have a spark of desire inside them ( can be deep rooted ...way down..), this whole transition can actually be an eye opener...

In my opinion, if you make best use of the opportunity, this could be THE experience that makes you the complete woman... I mean come on... who would say no to a woman who can do all of that mentioned above on one hand and do some productive and creative with the rest of the time on the other hand? Opportunities exist here in millions.. You actually get time to think about what is it that you actually wanna do with your life? It could be:

- Going back to school ( thats college here... or a PG in India).. earn that Masters in Science or Business and get a 6 figure salary job.. that most can only dream of!!

- Start something on your own...like a web company, or even a salon at home.. you will be minting by the minute and I am talking about dollars..

- You could focus on gym, work out.. Out here they have these group exercise classes that are a whole lot fun and can make you lose like 2 pounds in one class...

- You can challenge the creative side of you and finally get to do so much that you have only always "wanted" to do, but never really had a chance to....it could be photography, volunteer work, trekking, helicopter classes, horse riding, sailing... tonnes!!!!!

- You can free lance/work from home, earn money just sitting at home and working! There are a lotta takers for this too...:)

So there you go..Its not always the same old story for the 'bahu' who moves here.. I am not going to say "Gone are the days when all women did was sit and home and play the good wife and home maker".. cuz that still exists in abundance and there are women who happily resort to that...

This transition actually tries to throw you out of your comfort zone.. into a whole new sea where you need to learn how to swim all over again ( or swim differently) to survive..( course we all wanna survive..don't we???)And its nothing but an eye opener.. for you to see your life differently, for you to pursue your dreams and convert them into reality and live the life that you really always wanted to live....:)
So go on.. be a H4 bahu.. and make the difference...(If you wanna, that is...!!!)

-G

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Change the title to aruthal de. Looks good. Hope u really have time for nice blogging.All the best and keep blogging.

iamyuva said...

;) that what iam looking for-- so i can take up: spanish class, guitar class, photography, documentaries,..

Hitesh said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Deuce Acce said...

Nice blog,especially the illustrations :)
So are you busy now or looking for something?

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Anonymous said...

wHAT ABT gAP IN UR cv? I gonna be a challenge to rise the corporate ladder..