Thursday, July 15, 2010

What (not) to wear.

I am very excited! I am going to embark upon a uber controversial topic. If people view my blog and have the patience to read through my articles, and have that teensy extended bit of patience to leave a comment, then I am very excited to see what they have to say.

So lets get started.. My blog title reads what (not) to wear.. and the protagonist of our discussion is the "mangal sutra" or "thaali" as they call it in some cultures.
The wikipedia blurb reads....
"A Mangalsutra (mangala sutra, mangalasutra or thali) is a symbol of Hindu and Syrian Christian marriage union in India. It is a sacred thread of love and goodwill worn by women as a symbol of their marriage. Every Indian woman considers the mangalsutra the most revered token of love and respect offered to her during the marriage ceremony" According to Hindu cultural ethos, mangalsutra symbolizes the inseparable bond between a husband and a wife.During the wedding ceremony, the bridegroom ties the mangalsutra to the neck of the bride uttering- “May you live long by wearing this sacred Mangalsutra, the reason of my life”. Married women are entitled to wear Mangalsutra throughout their life as it is believed that the practice enhances the well being of her husband and family. It is also considered that the mangalsutra protects the marriage from any evil. A Hindu marriage is incomplete without the mangalsutra. Three knots symbolize three different aspects of a married woman- the first knot represents her obedience to the husband, the second to parents and the third represents her respect for God".

Sounds divine even reading through it right? I respect hindu mythology to a very great extent. A lot of things that were done in the ancient past - come to think of it has some scientific explanation to it. When this combination exists, I am floored! really.

According to ancient history, wearing the mangal sutra is supposed to have a strong significance.. as you read in the blurb above. Fast forward >> in todays day and people still hold regard for things like this? Have things like comfort, style, what others might think, looks taken precedence over the ancient beliefs and myths of some sort?
How many out there wear their thaali on a daily basis? Is it ok not to wear it? Is it really true that by not wearing it, we are falling easy prey to evil and disrespecting our culture?
There have been many talk shows (mostly in the southern part of the world and asian countries) that have been discussed this topic.

My take on this..Cat on the wall.. I really don't know. I no longer wear mine..(oops!!) and thats mainly because

- its too heavy
- its too bling ( I hate gold unless it has some emerald and ruby to it - yeah expensive taste)
- it makes this clinky sound and causes an allergy near my chest..(sux)
- It doesnt go with all types of clothes..
- It attracts many unwanted questions from strangers which you may be obliged to answer
- Its too bling and heavy - ohh I have mentioned that

So there! thats why I dont wear it... I dont know if I am doing anything wrong by not wearing it.
Ofcourse when I visit a temple, or go to any traditional gathering that is bound to have nosey gossipers, that blingy thing will be hanging around my neck...

I personally believe that the good will and nice thoughts for your husband's well being should exist in your heart and you should pray for it from deep within and sincerely want it. And most importantly - practice it! You can still wear your thaali, act all pious and then go off on a tangent! How many such stories have we heard.
I believe that the power of prayer and sincerity in action can make many wishes and desires come true.
I guess this is one of the biggest reasons that I consider it ok to not wear it and not feel gulity about it.
I know I may be attracting a lot of controversy and people judging me. I may not make everyone happy.. but at the end of the day, I am happy and at peace with my self and my belief. I dont want to do something because it has to be done ( unless I am literally forced to and if the life of a loved one depended on it).

- G


Anonymous said...

hi gits,
even i used to 'not' wear it on a daily basis. i used to say its heavy, not stylish, doesn't go well with all clothes... i rarely wore it.. i used to forget to wear it when i go to temples too.. that was until very recently... i'd to wear it cos of relatives and i was about to lose it... i got attached to it emotionally/sentimentally since then and have been wearing it regularly (almost) for past one month... i may continue to wear it for another few months maybe and then back to not wearing it... since i almost lost it, i value it so much (not just the gold part, but sentimental value)...
had it been a month ago, i would've said 'ditto'... i'll give it another few months and i'll say ditto too...

Ramya said...

Nice one,
you have touched on an age old debate :)



Mysteeque said...

Hey Ranj.. trust me ve been the exact sentimentally attached phase...I used to tell the hubby..oh am never gonna part with makes me feel secure..
But those were the days..
Hey if you are comfy wearing it, you should... do what you really feel like doing and not for the heck of it:)

@ Ramya - thanks! I tried to...:)

Gowri said...

Adi paavi.. that said.. i tried to take if off couple of times from my lass's neck.. she hits me real hard and scolds me and gives an hour long lecture after that!

- Gowri

Monica said...


I would like to share my thoughts too...
I also don't believe wearing a few gms of gold can help ur husband's longevity.I might as well motivate him to join a gym.I am a gym-mer myself.
So I chose not to wear tali though I get some nasty comments from people. I wear it only on those big occasions wear the ignorant aunty/uncle families come together.